As a mom of four, going on five, boys in seven years, I heartily endorse it. The first cup of joe is a necessary dose of medicine for early mornings when the little ones hit the ground running. Which they do. Momma can't be far behind. Ahead is better.
"Tired" is in the description of motherhood. Pregnancy, the odd baby schedule, then the rambunctious toddler years, the precocious pre-schooler, the inquisitive kindergartener, and the chattery elementary school kid can leave a mom a wee bit exhausted.
Times a hundred.
With a thousand million things to do that can't wait till tomorrow.
Plus the billion other things that can wait, a bit.
It's tough.
I'm using up calories and running through hormones like nobody's business. So there are times I just need to eat an egg or up my magnesium intake or get off the computer and that'll give me a healthy kick in the pants to keep going till (the blessed hour of) bedtime. But sometimes I must take stock.
Is it my body that is truly weary - or my soul?
When was the last moment I paused in the day to thank God for something?
Did I pray for the child before jumping into discipline?
Am I breathing out impatience or encouragement?
Is there a verse in my head I'm pondering, or a complaint I'm harboring?
Why haven't I smiled today?
Can I really blame the rain for my attitude? Or the finances? Or the squashed bug under my barefoot?
I may be grumpy because this life is wearing, tough on joints and limbs and metabolism. Maybe I need to sit down because the blood in my ankles just needs help to fight gravity past my bulging tummy. It could be that my mind is spinning from the last dozen questions the 5 year old asked about reproduction. Perhaps lugging the two year old around the garden for an hour really did do a number on my back. It might be that I just don't know what to make for supper, and if it's healthy then nobody's gonna like it no matter what I choose.
But really, are my weariness and short temper a result of something beyond the skin-deep fatigue?
As the deer pants for the water brooks, so pants my soul for You, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God."
Psalm 42:1-2
Perhaps my hunger is for something deeper than buttered toast in the morning. It's my soul that feels thin. Worn. Craving.
I might try to satisfy my longings with donuts and too much Facebook. They taste good, for a moment. But there is no sustenance. Need goes unmet.
The pure hearty laughter of a two year old jolts me from numbness back to awareness of some deeper desire. No, I don't have hours to spend in Bible study; not for now. But I don't need to. Four course dinners are nice, but not practical during rush hour...
I don't have deep, hours-long serious discussions with my husband every day. But I talk to him often, laugh with him over the antics of one of our shared descendants, smile over an inside joke we share at the dinner table. I can have that with God too. Even better, since I can talk to Him in the night while my husband snores oblivious beside me. I can find joy in His creation even while my husband is at work. I can trust to Him my tears, my worry, while arm deep in dishwater. I can remember His tender hand on me when I feel a parenting failure heavy on my shoulders.
O my God, my soul is cast down within me; therefore I will remember You... (verse 6).
And, incrementally, I am revived as I turn my eyes back to Him. My soul feels refreshed. I throw out the remainder of the kids' peanut butter from lunch while my own chicken salad sits neglected on the counter until I have a moment to touch it, and this time I remember to praise Him for provision of food, and the invention of mayonnaise and pickles. Deep within, before I ever get to that first bite of actual food, substance starts to meet hunger.
Deep calls unto deep at the noise of Your waterfalls; all Your waves and billows have gone over me. The Lord will command His lovingkindness in the daytime, and in the night His song shall be with me - A prayer to God for my life.
(verses 7-8).
There are moments when I get frustrated with this life I lead. There's so much pressure to do it right. But my understanding is pivoting. This life I lead - aren't I supposed to be following instead?
He - my Guide, the Lamp to light my path, the King of all the earth, my Father, my Friend, my God - He is the rightful Leader of my life. And I must say, He does a far better job of it.
Why are you cast down, O my soul? Why are you disquieted within me?
Hope in God;
For I shall yet praise Him, the help of my countenance and my God.
Psalm 42:11
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| Daddy always shares. |
As for the other stuff, well, there is a reason why God invented drive-through coffee places.
There when you need it.
Take advantage.
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